Deftnition - legal terms

Locust standi

When a lot of people claim personal damage and swarm to file criminal cases all over the country to get at a particular person.

Example: Sanal Edamaruku

ABC of branding

Sometimes, slaves of brands get it subtly wrong

अभी इनको क्या कहें?

Deftnition

What do you call transsexual women?

Ex-men.

The trees on the side of the hills

There is this forest of oaks that grows in a hilly region.

Now, here's the thing: the trees on top of the hills, they grow pretty fast.
The trees at the bottom of the hill, down in the valley, they grow less fast, but still, fast.
The trees on the sides, though, have the slowest growth rates.

Why?

Simple.

They are slope oaks.

Deftnition

Deftnition: a daffy, deft definition

Overwhew

(o-ver-wh-ee-u, usually said with a great sigh)

n. The relief expressed at finally finding the summary.

A great many people in offices panic when the boss wants a summary which they were dead sure they made and sent to the boss at least 10 days ago, but the email seems to have been lost.

Deftnitions

Deftnitions aka daffy, deft definitions, continued...

Celeberation

(se-le-bee-ray-sh'n)

n. Calling all employees for a celebration of achievements, and then using the occasion to berate them for not doing as well as the boss really wanted them to.

This is common in all offices, particularly in the annual conferences!

What illness does a calligrapher fear?

Art writis.

Windows' next version

Overheard in a college:

DM: How come Windows' next version is 10? Can't they count? The last version was 8.

RC: DM, don't you know? 7 8 9...!

DM: That actually makes sense.

UC: It's weird how much sense that makes.

Thanks, guys, for letting me use your joke!

Kneading machine

There was a young woman who got married. Her parents decided to gift her a dough-making machine.

However, her in-laws would have none of it, and promptly returned the machine to her parents.

"We don't believe in taking any dough-ry," said her father-in-law huffily.

"Yes," added her mother-in-law. "We have no knead for these things."

Election time

Thanks to the Supreme Court, 'note' in elections will be replaced by NOTA.