Monday, September 24, 2012

Understanding Microsoft

I was just thinking, why did Windows name their old version XP?

Then I realised: it's an emoticon! See: XP

Eyes scrunched up tight, tongue stuck out. A very bitter and sour lemon has just been swallowed.

All is explained!

Saturday, August 25, 2012

The unmarried planets

All the planets in the solar system are unmarried.

But Saturn is engaged.


It has a ring.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

एन डी तिवारी की सोच

इस गाने से एन डी तिवारी की सोच समझ आती हैः

तुम लाख छुपाओ बाप मगर
दुनिया को पता चल जाएगा.
लेकिन डर-डर के छुपने से
छुपने का मज़ा तो आएगा!

ND Tiwari's reasoning

This song explains ND Tiwari's reasoning:

Tum lakh chhupaao baap magar,
Duniya ko pataa chal jaayegaaaaaa.
Lekin dar-dar ke chhipne se
Chhipne ka mazaa to aayegaaaaaa.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Deftnition

"What is the best descriptive way to refer to both the corrupt current occupant of a post, and his/her modus operandi?"

"Income bent."

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Naming the types

Teacher, taking an oral quiz for the computer class: What would you call the database types?

Student: Well, I would call them Chhotu, Bunty and Raju.

Not in the dictionary

"Why do you hate her?"
"Hate? Me? No, no, no. I don't hate. Other people hate. I don't hate. In fact, the word is not in my dictionary."
"Errrrr... you just said it."
"Oh, that. I wasn't using my dictionary..."

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Sunday, April 29, 2012

भौतिकी की कक्षा में

एक भौतिकी के छात्र के शिक्षक ने पूछा : "Relative speed क्या होता है?"

छात्र सोचने लगा, फिर उछल कर बोला: "मेरे रिश्तेदार बहुत तेज़ हैं!"

Deftnitions

Pun:
An abbreviation for 'punishment'

Raging about fair skin

When you don't understand this increasing anxiety about dark skin which leads to a demand for fairness creams, you bemusedly ask: "Why this kala worry, kala worry, kala worry, dear?"

Deftnitions

Concatenation:
The online country of legally guilty felines

 

(Con cat e-nation)

Monday, January 23, 2012

Exercise

Exercise.

It's better than the alternative: aches or sighs...

Chemistry student

I'm teaching the new organic chemistry student about functional groups. We reach aldehydes, and consider the formula of formaldehyde. I ask him what the next aldehyde would be called.

The student looks up, and with the innocent expression of the true imp, says: "Informaldehyde?"