At the heart of 'believe'

At the heart of 'believe' is 'lie'.
Be suspicious. Be very suspicious.

Anti-social network

If you want to make a phony profile or spoof a celebrity, which social network do you use?

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Go on, guess...

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It's easy...

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Fakebook, of course. It's the most famous anti-social network on the internet.

Daffynitions: Gurgoan

A Gurgoan is someone who can be at a sunny beach while still stuck in a traffic jam at IFFCO chowk in the Millenium City.

Facebook की एक कहानी भाग 2

खैर, वृद्ध ने इधर-उधर पूछ के पता कर लिया की facebook क्या है। लड़के से भी पूछ आये और अपनी भतीजी को बताया कि, हाँ, लड़के का facebook account है।

भतीजी निकली ढूँढने। लड़के का नाम 'अजय कुमार' जैसे कोई आम नाम था (नहीं, उसका नाम अजय कुमार नहीं था), तो भतीजी को मिले कोई १०० 'अजय कुमार'। उसने वृद्ध को फ़ोन किया कि पूछो उसने कमीज़ कैसी पहनी है?

वृद्ध ने पूछ लिया, और जवाब दिया कि धारियों वाली कमीज़ है।

फिर मुश्किल। ऐसे भी १५ लड़के निकले। भतीजी ने फ़ोन घुमाया, "पूछना ज़रा, धारियां चौड़ी हैं या पतली?"

जहाँ तक मुझे पता है, खोज अभी जारी है।

Facebook part 2

Anyway, the old man asked someone else what this 'facebook' was all about, and was greatly enlightened. He asked the 'boy' if he was on facebook and promptly informed his niece that the answer was yes.

Now the 'boy' had a fairly common name, like Ajay Kumar (not his real name), so when the niece went hunting on facebook, she found about a hundred people. So she asked her uncle what shirt the 'boy' was wearing on facebook.

The answer was duly conveyed back: a striped shirt.

Next day, the niece was back. There were 20 Ajay Kumars with striped shirts. "Ask him," she said, "whether the stripes are wide or narrow."

The search is still on, far as I know.

Facebook की एक कहानी भाग 1

एक वृद्ध को अपनी भतीजी की बेटी के लिए एक अच्छा रिश्ता सूझा। भतीजी को भी लड़के का विवरण पसंद आया, और उसकी फोटो देखने का दिल किया। पर उसे जल्दी-जल्दी रिश्ता बढ़ाना भी नहीं था। इसलिए उसने ताउजी से पूछा, "क्या वह facebook पर है?"

अब ताउजी कैसे मान जाएँ की उन्हें facebook का अदा-पता नहीं? वह झल्ला उठे: "पगली! यहाँ मैं तुझे उसका face दिखा रहा हूँ, और तू facebook-facebook बोले जा रही है!"

Facebook part 1

An old man was matchmaking for his grand-niece. He told them about this very nice 'boy' who was the son of his good friend.

The grand-niece's parents were receptive. They wanted to see a picture of the 'boy', and asked the old man, "Is he on facebook?"

The old man didn't want to admit he didn't know what they were talking about, so he replied in annoyance, "What's wrong with you? Here I am ready to show you his face, and you want a facebook?"

Chemistry lesson

The teacher asked, "What is the full name of the chemical KMnO4?"

The student chirpily replied, "It's potassium, magnesium and lots of oxygen!"

The teacher sarcastically asked, "If Mn is magnesium, what's Mg then?" Ha! Gotcha!

"Simple!" chortled the student. "It's milligrams!" D-uh!

Thought for the day

The pun is mightier than the sword.

Wassup?

Three kids were walking down a road in Gurgaon.

You could clearly make out how much they were influenced by chat/SMS lingo when they passed a stray dog and one of them asked it, "Wassup?"

As the other two smiled, he answered for the dog, "NM*," and they continued walking.

When they reached the next dog, he again said, "Wassup," and also supplied the answering, "NM."

By the time he did this with the fourth dog (this is Gurgaon, remember, so there are no end of stray dogs), his friends were openly sniggering.

But when he passed over the fifth dog to go "Wassup?" at the sixth, they pulled his elbow and asked him why he'd left the previous one out.

"Oh," he shrugged, "that one is offline."

*"Nothing Much", for those who spend insufficient time online.